So you think that the words Deals and Aspen in the same sentence constitute an oxymoron? All things monetary are relative I suppose…but finding “deals” in Aspen is not the ordeal you might suppose. Your travel professional isn’t holding out on you or anything (I hope), most of them just don’t have the luxury of living here like I do!

The real deals are free, right? So stick these in your leaky memory banks my fuzzy friends. There are also some “not so free” things to do too but that’s for another article. Here is a list of free activities compiled from over 30 years of nearly brain-dead, alley-sniping research:

• Sitting on a bench in the mall watching the real estate agents making “deals” (a totally different animal) on their cell phones.
• Catching a RFTA bus at Rubey Park to the Aspen Recreation Center to scale the fiberglass climbing wall.
• Hiking the Ute Trail with your dog (I have an old black Lab you can borrow).
• Sitting on the lawn at the Aspen Music Festival tent (listening to music or not).
• Playing Frisbee with my dog.
• Looking for the old owl at ACES (Aspen Center for Environmental Studies).
• Practicing putting at the Aspen Golf Club (or you can sneak on the other end of the driving range and hit the Junior Golf’s practice balls, just kidding…)
• Fishing for Brookies in the Roaring Fork River at the North Star Preserve pedestrian bridge.
• Sitting on the “Cheeks” bench on the mall at Galena and Cooper watching the moguls break on Ajax in May.
• Riding the Maroon Bells/Ashcroft Ghost Town loop d’loop.
• Eating Thanksgiving dinner at St. Mary’s church.
• Frolicking in the computer-operated water fountain on the mall.
• Stealing maraschino cherries from the fruit tray at the St. Regis lobby bar.
• Sneaking into the Elks Lodge No. 224 on Friday afternoons.
• Playing fetch and poop-pickup in Wagner Park with my dog.
• Hanging out in the Pitkin County Library watching the old men (like me) cussing the computers.

A little more semi-worthless information about the Aspen Elks Club Lodge No. 224: This is the best seat in the house for fireworks on Aspen Mountain. The sky lights up over the old mining town every 4th of July, Winterskol, and during Word Cup ski races. So if you are an Elk, or know one, or are up for sneaking in, do yourself a huge favor and experience one of these event at least once while you are still kicking!

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